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The Day I Yelled “Fuck” in the Middle of Dinner

Kitchen Group Shot-6212

“Here, chug it.”

“We’re chugging wine?”

“Yes. Someone get Alfie. Rikki! Leave the dishes and get over here. Cheers!”

And down the hatch it went. Chugging red wine from paper cups on my last night of work in the kitchen.

Except, holy shit, WTF is that sludge in the bottom of the cup?! Gulp gulp, gulp, tastes like vinegar…. ABORT! ABORT! Definitely vinegar.

“Fuck! What was that!?”

And just when I thought, Was there soy sauce in there? Am I going to barf? an onslaught of condiments came hurtling toward me. Cream pie to the hair, a heavy dusting of cocoa and a shower of oil from squeeze bottles had me cowering in a banana box, yelling expletives while normal people had lovely desserts at Francesca’s Italian Kitchen. Laughing and crying and dripping, I got got. Apparently you aren’t supposed to trust anyone on your last day in the kitchen. I didn’t know that.

 I had an awesome job in Wanaka. I worked with people who helped me make a career change from teacher to chef (though I don’t feel comfortable using that title quite yet). I made friends with four chefs who taught me everything I needed to know. How to use the meat slicer, segment oranges, make sabayon, skin a ham, trim a filet, make pastry cream, plate food and do that little smear of caramel on a dessert plate.

They taught me what its like to work in a kitchen, to use scales and timers, to label things and always be looking at tomorrow. They showed me how to work during those in between moments during service, to prep more lettuce for the next rush, or get the hazelnuts roasting so tomorrow you can just come in and get started on the praline. Or to caramelize apples in the middle of service because people are eating twice as much dessert tonight (they do that when its cold).

I loved learning skills and spending my whole day working with food. In New York, I looked forward to preparing food when I got home from work, but now I get to do that for work. But the thing is, I don’t care too much for stress. And I like eating dinner. Neither of which jive too well with making many other people’s dinner all at the same time. Despite not loving dinner service, I’ll probably wind up doing it in several more restaurants, as it is an awesome arena for learning new skills.

I decided to send my knives home and will pick up an all purpose knife along the way. I’m going to miss the scales, kitchen aid mixer, and easy answers from experienced chefs, but as a going away present, my kitchen fam gave me an awesome travel spice kit so I can still work some magic over the camp stove or in the communal hostel kitchen.

Hopefully our paths will cross again. Maybe next time it will be in front of a pig on a spit at our farm :)

Share this!
    1. James G says:

      Thought of you when we went to Francesca’s a few weeks ago in Wanaka. We had a great meal, and just loved the place. Shame you were not there then!

      • Stina says:

        Hi James! Too bad we missed each other! Glad to hear dinner was good. Zach and I just feasted on dumplings here in Melbourne and I thought of you. Your classes look like so much fun. Keep ‘em coming, NZ needs more dumplings :)

    2. Mom M says:

      Poor you…but I got a kick out of it!
      Love,
      Pat

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